my passenger

This is a letter to my unborn.

maybe one day, one fine day you will get to read this.
A letter to my unborn zara.

You are almost at the end of your trip little one.
I can almost imagine you - all dimply, smiley, at times sulky
and at times stubborn, intelligent and witty, charming and beautiful.
i can feel you play in me tummy right now, kicking and turning and doing cartwheels 
a lovely sensation :)
i hope that is my energy & spirit you exhibit, and with that energy i hope you get your fathers center and focus to go with that.


you need a sense of humor like mommys and daddys - a hearty laugh will be something 
you will need in your lifetime.


i hope you get my curiosity and my urge to venture into "new" territories
but you need your fathers planning skills to keep things in order as you venture


we hope to teach you to question that which you do not understand 
but with that you will need your fathers discernment and with a big heart

i hope you share your fathers artistic mind and eye - with attention to detail

you are my baby, my child, my joy, my legacy, my world
i can only imagine holding you in my arms, playing with you, sitting on your fathers lap
we cannot wait to see you at the end of this trip little one.


most of all your father and i hope to teach you to be inquisitive, kind, hopeful, respectful,
how to love - to love yourself and others, how to handle turmoil because it will be there 
and how to be real and honest with yourself and others.


we await your arrival little passenger :)

envy?

How will this pan out?
Search and wish, so loud
Keep a candle burning
To each his own should learn

Before I turn in envy, I learn through sorrow
I turn in envy and go... to the wall

See how the colors run?
And feel your Sunday rest
Give me a name, bring it in, some change is for the best

I may not win the race
I may not reach the top
Or I may not live your way;
It doesn't mean I'm stuck here
We may not fit the mold
Kind of going off
Well, the medicine inside takes a stronger hold

As we turn in envy, I learn through sorrow
I turn in envy and go... to the wall

Before I burn with envy, I learn through sorrow
I burn with envy and go... to the wall

To the wall




chevelle - envy - 

my muse

everything is swell,

all is going so well,

i can even say i have it all,

but,

one dark thingy lurks,

it threatens to destroy all the good things,

and this one time,

i am not in control,

i can do nothing,

i can say nothing,

they want my life,

they want our life,

they will do anything,

they will say anything,

do  not listen,

don't let them win,

i never listened,

i should have listened to you,

i was selfish,

i thought i knew it all,

i never listened,

now here we are,

i am sorry,

i seek pardon,

forgive us,

is it too late,

is this the end,

am i dead...,

are you dead...,

don't let them win,

don't give in to them,

don't give in to their demands

don't give in to your fears,

your demons,

give in to me,

give in to my wisdom,

give in to my soul,

let me have your soul,

i am your fuel,

i am your heaven,

i am your hell,

i am your peace,

i am your downfall,

i am your everything,

you are my everything,

the seed,

your seed,

my seed,

our seed,

it grows,

let us sow 

let us reap what we sow,

let us look back,

let us look back and laugh at them,

laugh at us,

let us look back only to learn from it,

you are my muse.